Friday, September 30, 2011

The Releasing Demon: Fairtytales... Child's Play?

Have you ever reached a point where you knew exactly what you want but did not know how to get it? When the perfect life is but only an arm reach away and the only thing holding you back is you? What else is there to do but keep fighting, keep trying, keep reaching for it?

But what happens when you have a split second thought that maybe it's actually now what you want? Should one sit back and asses exactly the direction one's own particular choices might take one? Is it really a case of opening my mouth and saying?

So, although I am filled with more hope than I have felt in ages - and hope is a goodie, it always has the possibility of achievement - I am still left in two minds over whether or not I am leaning towards a more realistic/pessimistic perspective of looking at love or am I growing up?

It seems all too evident that nothing in this world lasts forever. Sure. But does that mean I should foresee an end before the crossing line is even in plain view? Of course not. It is most definitely a point of taking in what you can while it is up for grabs. And although this may seem like such a harsh way of interpreting love, the evidence stacked against love, that love is in fact bitter and sweet, is far more prevalent thus believable than a cheesy 'nineties' Gloria Estefan hit of Everlasting Love.

The point is not the disillusion of love but how to turn that love into something that can survive. Like a plant, through harsh winters and bitter breezes, once spring rolls on in it begins to grow again, bigger, faster and with more vigor. So should a relationship not be nurtured by those in it? I mean the plant in question is that of two hearts that slowly begin to beat together and not necessarily amalgamate with each other.

As a wise man once said: "I am not young enough to know everything" and the older I get the more I understand the point. It's the disillusionment of the notions we have as young people that in turn makes us real living adults. But when do we start becoming tainted from the abysmal failures in our quest for love that it in fact leaves any idea of a relationship to come drenched in disdain and ill content? When we allow it too!

So the objective is to always, but i mean always, scrutinize what we may have done wrong and better that. I keep my mouth shut far too often for fear of abandonment however the ironic thing is that I am abandoned for the fact that I keep my mouth shut. A vicious cat and mouse game i am playing all on my own.

So stop the fairytale of the perfect relationship and try create a real one... everlasting or not!


Mind Of Mine said...

I relate to this post quite a bit, not just for love but for life as well.

I always want relationships, which are passionate and consuming, which always end up a bad break up, filled with hate.

In life, to have my dream job right in front of me but being afraid to grab it because I am worried I will fuck it up later on down the line when I invitably self destruct again.

Juanne-Pierre said...

I here that man! The trick is just to always reach out and grab!

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