Friday, March 11, 2011

My 100th Post... is that much? mmmmm

So, in spirit of seeing if this blog, or should I say blogger, has anything real to actually say about life, sex and well, really, love... I thought it best just to ramble on... I do not have a point... I am stoned and this is what is in my head.

Good Luck!

The love I have for myself is so deeply rooted in the immense pride I have had to to build for myself as a gay homosexual man. I can't speak for all gay men but as one i can say that I was extremely ashamed of the thoughts I would have as a kid. the amount of self loathing that comes from hating the thoughts no one else can hear really pushed me to find a way to find out what really is right and wrong or good and bad and not really on anyone else's ideas, especially religion. Yeah, good little catholic boy talking.

so what I did was live out in the open when I came out. Maybe live a little too limitless with regards to what people wanted to actually hear but it was my early twenties and i wanted to know how do I train myself to always do what is inherently good, not right but good. But remember that's taking in the fact that what I am thinking in my head is not wrong.

So, religion is wrong, gay is cool. But at the same time, really, checking out what our bible had to say about homosexuality was important. Most of what I found was in the old book and really i have always just been fascinated in Jesus, his humble nature, always making the good choice, he sounds beautiful and admirable. as a kid I always enjoyed hearing about this amazing man... and i still do. so i kinda just went on what Jesus would say and I carried on with my little gay love life sans old book, yeah.

Yeah, so, from where I sit now I wonder if sometimes too liberal, even though more right, is actually bad? Where do we draw the line as gay guys, collectively, on something like that. Is it just a case of turning a blind eye here and there? What is our opinion? I cant seem to get a collective idea, like say for instance we had a town that was 100% gay, gay, gay, totally self sustaining, totally brilliant, and we had to create a set of rules we as a community abide by... what would they be?

So in an attempt to come full circle... I love, i love maybe a little too much so that means I also have a great ability to hate? If so i will put the hate in a good place...

Nell, has to be one of the most irritating movies in the world, I dont get it, it is odd, I find so many faults with it and it irritates me. and it is very very ugly to watch!


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